showered with blessings

i have 10,000 things i need to do, but i just needed to post this right now.

my mom just called.  one of my sister-in-law’s best friends, suzanne, was due to deliver a baby girl in about 6 weeks.  she’s had an awesome pregnancy, had the nursery finished, and was looking forward to her baby shower – TONIGHT.  suzanne went to the doctor this morning and they couldn’t find a heartbeat.  they did an ultrasound and, again, no heartbeat.  they told her that her baby has died.  I CANNOT FATHOM THE SADNESS.  i cannot imagine the anger, the helplessness, or even the probable guilt. 

when Harper was about 5 days old, a friend of a friend lost her 6 week old son, hosea.  he died of unknown reasons during an afternoon nap (SIDS, i guess).  hosea’s death seriously affected me and the way that i viewed my role as Harper’s mother.  i literally saw every day after that as a blessing from the Lord and my viewpoint completely changed.  i realized that our children are on loan to us from the Lord.  He can do with them as He chooses and His choice is sovreign and always justified, no matter how much our human understandings say otherwise.

this unborn baby’s death has yet again reminded me to count every day as BLESSED and to be grateful for every second that i get to hold my children, whether they be screaming or sleeping.  THANK YOU LORD. 

if you think about it, say a prayer for suzanne and her husband.  they are strong believers and i know that this will certainly challenge their walk with the Lord.

baby hannah was born this morning ( 08.07.08 ) after a scheduled induction.  she is in heaven.  to read more about this family and what they are going through, visit www.benandsuz.com.

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5 Comments to “showered with blessings”

  1. wow…i can’t even imagine. i can’t even begin to think how one would cope with that experience.

    i have been thinking about hosea a lot in the last couple of weeks.

  2. I’m in tears-Thank you for that reminder KT-so so true.

  3. I remember hearing about Hosea when I was very pregnant and it stayed on my mind almost daily when Jonas was a newborn. I just remember being so grateful that God kept Jonas living and breathing everyday AND so sad for them because I honestly don’t know how people move on from something like that. I will be praying for them.

  4. Thank you for this post, Katie. I too have been looking at Owen differently today. The little things that frustrate me about motherhood have been put into a whole new perspective. I have to remember that there are so many women who would give anything to have a baby wake them up with piercing screams. I imagine a silent house after the death of a child must be the worst sound in the world. And yet, our hope is not found in the guarantee of safe, healthy children. We must remember that God has numbered our days, including our children’s days. He IS sovereign, but He is also good. I cannot quite wrap my head around that fact in times like this. Lord, help me to believe.

  5. I love that song, “i can Only Imagine”. The mirror image of that is this truly sad event. I can not even begin to imagine the pain and sadness Susanne and Ben are feeling right now. As julie said, the only hope we have in cooping with something like this is to earnestly believe that “God is sovereign over all things” and we cannot know his plan or purpose. For some reason, He allows us to experience this level of suffering (I guess that will be one of the top five questions in Heaven). My constant prayer is that if God ever choses to place this level of burden on my family members He will also encircle us with His love, discernment and strong Christian brothers/sisters.

    The comments made about appreciating your childern more is true with grandParents all of the time. We know what a blessing they are and that they won’t be childern forever … and our time is limited, too.

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